Confronting Rejection

by Tamara Jacobs


How does one prepare themselves mentally and emotionally to face all of the rejection that they’ll experience in their mid to late twenties? Unfortunately rejection is inevitable- at every stage of your life of course, but it seems even more so when you’re in your later twenties. You look behind you and see years of work, years of preparation and experience. You’re ready to put yourself out there and give it your best shot. You’ve got the degrees, you’ve done the internships, put in the hours, but when it comes time to apply for jobs it seems the answer is often no- if we even get a reply at all.

Similarly, people in their late twenties look behind them and see a string of relationships, some positive, some destructive, others fleeting and never properly defined. You’ve travelled, learnt and grown as a person; you think you know who you are and what you want. And again you put yourself out there, into the world of love, sex and temptation and the response you get isn’t always the one you wanted.

And that’s when you realize, that all that flattery, all that praise and encouragement you received from parents and teachers every day growing up- the reason for it all was to prepare you for a world that is often unfair. To ensure that you would continue believing in yourself and your potential even when the world seemed cruel.

Fathers call their daughters ‘princesses’ because in the microcosm that matters to them- family- that’s exactly who they are. But also because they have to, if they want to make sure that their daughters grow up believing that they deserve nothing less than a prince.

Teachers tell their young students that they have potential, because they want them to know that they could do anything. That there are always options for them. That they shouldn’t be discouraged if one thing doesn’t work out because there are so many others that could and will.

The world is full of love, but it is also full of rejection- even for those deemed ‘lucky’. And that rejection can start to eat you up and take a chip off your confidence. It can make you feel empty, ugly and incapable. But that’s when you have to remember all of the encouragement you were given. Remember that all of that confidence still exists inside of you. That’s when you have to pick yourself up, shake off any hard feelings and put yourself out there again. Because generally speaking, fearing the ‘no’ results in fewer ‘yeses’.